Offer Sympathy For a Marriage Separation or Divorce • Example Letters, Guides and Samples

Guides

This letter should respectfully acknowledge the reader's circumstance, while offering comfort and support. Be brief, honest, and sincere as you write the message by hand using personal stationery.

How to write this sympathy letter:

  1. Express your sympathy briefly.
  2. Offer the reader your sympathy and support.

Example Letter #1

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I have just learned of your divorce and want you to know I am here to offer support. I know it may be one of the hardest things you will have to endure in your life. Please know that there is still a lot to look forward to. You know I have been divorced five years, and with time the pain does go away. Know that I care about you and want you to be happy.

Example Letter #2

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I feel sad hearing that you and John are separating. Your heart must be broken. Divorce is such a difficult thing. Please know that I will always be your friend regardless of your marital status. I am here for you if you need a confidant.

Example Letter #3

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My heart aches for you at this trying time, and I felt that I must let you know how deeply sorry I am about your divorce. I know this must be a painful experience, and I hope it will not be long before the clouds start to lift. I don't want to intrude, but I do want to be a supportive friend. Please call if you need anything or if you just want to talk.

Example Letter #4

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I heard about your decision to divorce John and want you to know that my thoughts often are with you both.

Write Your Letter Step-by-Step

1 Express your sympathy briefly.

Sample Sentences for Step 1
  • We were surprised and deeply sorry to hear that you and John are divorcing.
  • Now that your divorce is final, I am sure you must be going through a very difficult transition.
  • We are sending you and Jane a copy of this letter to let you both know how deeply sorry we are to hear of your divorce.
  • My heart aches for you at this very difficult and challenging time.
  • I was deeply disturbed when your mother told me that you and John are separating.
  • As a lifelong friend and confidant, I felt it necessary to write you this letter hopes of persuading you and John to reconsider your recent separation.
Sample Phrases for Step 1
  • concerned that such a promising marriage should not endure
  • helping each other in times of crisis
  • in hopes of persuading you to reconsider
  • know you are taking this step after serious consideration
  • know that you had hoped to iron out your differences
  • let you know how deeply sorry we are
  • must be going through
  • realize you would not take this step lightly
  • sorry that life has held such
  • sorry that things didn't work out
  • sorry you have to go through this difficult time
  • such a painful experience for you
  • this could not have been an easy decision
  • this very difficult and challenging time
  • very painful experience
  • very difficult transition
  • very stressful time for both of you
  • was deeply disturbed to hear
  • was not aware you were having serious problems
  • were surprised and deeply sorry to hear
  • were shocked to hear

2 Offer the reader your sympathy and support.

Sample Sentences for Step 2
  • After years of relying on a partner, facing life as a single person can be scary. Still, change often brings growth.
  • We all begin marriage with a "happily ever after" vision of the future, and when things don't work out as we had planned, it seems as if the world is caving in on us.
  • I am deeply concerned that such a promising union should not endure.
  • I know you both well enough to know that you would not make this decision without considering the consequences. If I could, I would dissuade you from your decision, as I know firsthand the pain and frustration it breeds.
  • We have written a short note to John as well to let you both know that we are eager to help in any way we can.
  • I am confident you will emerge from this transition with a new outlook on life and an improved sense of self-worth.
  • We want you to know that we still think the world of both of you and hope that you will continue to accept our friendship.
  • For your sake and the sake of your children, please give the separation further consideration. But whatever your decision, I will always remain your steadfast friend.
  • Please know that I have only your best interest in mind, and that I will support you in any way I can in the months ahead.
Sample Phrases for Step 2
  • after years of having a partner
  • all hope to live "happily ever after" but
  • all begin marriage with
  • can seem as if the world is caving in on us
  • can be very frightening
  • can seem very lonely
  • can be scary
  • care deeply for both of you
  • confident you'll come through this transition well
  • eager to help in any way we can
  • facing life as a single person can
  • feel free to call on me
  • hard to close a door on so many years of your life
  • have written a short note
  • have also written
  • have only your best interests in mind
  • have been going through a difficult time
  • hope you both land on your feet
  • hope that you will find great happiness in the future
  • hope you will both think this through very carefully
  • hope your differences won't interfere with our friendship
  • hope you will continue to accept our friendship
  • know that you have good friends
  • know firsthand the pain and frustration
  • like to offer you a sympathetic ear
  • never realized that you
  • offer you my assistance and support
  • realize that you have given this step careful consideration
  • reconsider before things are finalized
  • sorry things didn't work out for you
  • still think the world of both of you
  • things don't always work out as we plan
  • thoughts and prayers are with you
  • were suffering friction in your relationship
  • were coping with serious problems
  • whatever your final decision
  • whatever your decision
  • will always be one of my dearest friends
  • will support you in any way I can
  • with an renewed sense of your own worth
  • with a new outlook on life